People These Days.

It’s funny how certain people think that just because they don’t agree with me, they can change my opinion or stop me from doing what I love by trying to make me seem like a fool. It’s just like dude, let me do what I feel I need to do because for me, it is making a difference on certain degrees and I’ll keep doing what I can to expand it even more. Humanity would eat itself alive if it weren’t for the people who tried to make a difference.

Overthinking.

Not many people really know the feeling of actually feeling something on an inner level. I don’t mean feeling happiness or sadness, and I don’t mean feeling something physically… I mean, feeling as in a universal, intuitive, indescribable feeling of something purely right inside and out, manifesting all around. I think that’s because people are so conditioned to worry all the time due to how we were raised in this society… you know, worrying about being late or about what this person thinks about us or about how to act in front of certain people so they will like us… just worrying about anything, even things that aren’t even in existence like a scenario we play in our minds of a situation that isn’t even happening in the Now. We have been taught to put all of our energies into materialistic, superficial things that a lot of people have kind of lost touch with our natural intuition.
I feel that depression shouldn’t be something that you take a pill for. I don’t get the whole ‘take drugs to release serotonin in your brain’ thing because that’s basically exactly like taking ecstasy or drinking (etc.) to temporarily take the depression away. They both have the same outcomes which are dependency over the drug and increased depression if you don’t continue taking the drug. All of which leaving no room for personal experience to independently grow and actually become cured. There are so many natural, drug-free things people can do to cure their depression. Studies have shown that being in nature on a day to day basis decreases depression and can actually cure it as well. Studies have also shown that gardening, creativity (drawing, painting, writing, etc.), exercise and eating organic whole foods decreases and can even cure depression as well.

Enough.

I'll seek you out, filet you alive.
One more word and you won't survive.
And I'm not scared of your stolen power.
I see right through you any hour.
I won't soothe your pain.
I won't ease your strain.
I'm taking it slow, feeding my flame.
I won't soothe your pain.

Finally.

Oh I have found the one who mends with eyes.

If I Only Knew Sooner.

I heard about your regrets.
I heard that you were feeling sorry
I heard from someone that you wish you could set things right..
Well, I guess I should have heard of that from you.
I guess I should have heard of that from you.

Fragile.

The moment that I realize I'm starting to get attached to someone. I want that feeling of being careless back. I want to go back to those nights I went to sleep not worrying about anything. I hate being so fragile. I hate taking everything so personally. I hate that the littlest things get to me more then things that should actually matter.
My insecurities could eat me alive.

Stop. Don't. Go.

I cry alot more.
My insomnia is coming back.
I don't write anymore.
I'm getting more quiet.
Slowing changing but it's not good.

If I Ever Feel Better.

I'd like to actually start writing again.
Lately everything has been going by so far.