21/365 - A Distance Mirror

We really don't think about the little things in life that makes it wonderful but you also feel that other side of happiness, joy that we all feel that isn't so ecstatic so we forget until it comes back but what if it never went away? Welcome to another side of thinking too much in the middle of the night, I think way too much that I actually make myself sick. I dream, hope and think way too much that my present life is so plain that I don't enjoy the time that I'm living now. I always try and plan on how, what I'm going to do but I really don't start. I talk and talk about them all the time but I don't do anything about it. Why can't I get started, I believe it's something inside me that is stopping me that makes me think that it's not a big deal that I could go back and always change it but I realize that I can't. I'm always wasting time and I don't think about what I could be doing or what I should be doing instead of doing something meaningless. I feel like nobody understand what I'm feeling because I say it so confusing that I don't even understand what I'm talking about. It might be good afar but when you get really close it's not such a pretty sight.